I’ve been spending some time thinking about distance lately. You can apply distance in a figurative and a literal sense. The difference being one is space kilometres, meters, miles countries and the other is creating metaphorical distance between you and a person that you need space from for one reason or another. While I’ve always been under the impression that distance is a bad thing. The more I think about it the more I think it can actually be good for you. Distance is a test, it allows you to eluate a situation and enables you to have an outside perspective.
I am a firm believer that perspective is everything while you’re stuck in the middle of a situation you don’t always think of or see the other options. You don’t always know what you’re capable of. A change in perspective can give you an opportunity to prove yourself and give you the confidence to keep on keeping on. I like the fact that when you distance yourself from a situation or person you’re able to work out what you want. You can think about what is important to you and distinguish whether or not you’re on the same page and are wanting the same things.
When someone you care about is away the first emotion you feel is loneliness. You miss them and them it definitely isn’t easy. Distance sucks. All you want to do is be with that person, their company is all you can think about but all you’ve got is the memory of spending time with them. When someone is away for an extended period of time it is easy to think that this feeling of missing them might eventually fade. It isn’t unreasonable to think maybe your feelings weren’t as strong as you thought. The test of time is an incredible thing. If weeks or months after that person left you’re still thinking about them then you’re onto something good.
Trust is one thing that is essential when you’re dealing with distance. While you might completely trust someone when they’re around you it’s a different story when they’re in another country, on the other side of the world. This is your time to decide do you trust them? If a person has never given you a reason not to trust them then you should go with your gut and let go. If you care enough about a person you will never stand in their way if they want to do something. As much as relationships are about emotion they’re about compromise. You can’t always get what you want and that’s a good thing. You need to be patient and have trust. Without either of these things you’ll end up hurting yourself and the person on the other end of that distance.
Figurative distance can also help if someone is becoming over bearing or controlling. The thing about friends is they just want the best for you. While it’s a fine line between being supportive and being controlling it’s important that you know your place and that your friends know their place too. It can be really difficult when you’re really close with someone and you do need a bit of space. You don’t want to hurt them or offend them and in your eyes their friendship is still really important it’s just about finding that balance between having some space and keeping up the friendship. There isn’t a wrong or right way of doing this. you just have to give it a go and hope that it works out. Don’t be afraid to keep those communication lines open after all communication is KEY with any friendship.
If the you’ve got someone you really care about who is away remember it’s perfectly fine to miss them. You shouldn’t ever feel bad about having feelings for someone it’s a completely natural thing to feel vulnerable in friendships. No one ever wants to get hurt but sometimes you’ve got to take a risk. Live on the wild side. Go get em and if it all comes crumbling down the best thing you can do is learn from the situation. Mistake are there to be learned from.